I was passionate and intentional about coaching basketball when I started my career just a few short years ago – insert sarcasm here. I attended coaching conferences, clinics and workshops. I read books and watched videos of the best coaches and what they did to be successful. I was always looking for the next best drill, scheme, offense or defense that I could add to my fiery competitive coaching style to get the most out of each player and the team. My coaching years have since passed, but that same desire to be good at something still exists. It’s now geared towards hunting.
Perhaps you can relate as you think about your passions and interests. Maybe they are work related, maybe a hobby, but none-the-less you are looking to learn as much as you can and/or be the best you can be in that endeavor. Anything worth doing and worth doing well takes time, effort, determination, hard work and perseverance. You will face hardships, challenges and setbacks along the way. But the result is always so worth it. Who wants to be average? Who wants to go through the motions of life and just coast? Not me and I hope not you either. Marriage should be no different. Your marriage is way more important than your job, your hobbies and interests. It’s way more important than coaching or hunting.
We should all be intentional about being the best spouse and having the best marriage we can possibly have. Look at the following verses from the bible on love. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance”. Which descriptions jump out to you as areas of improvement in your marriage? Are you patient? Kind? Jealous? Boastful? Rude? Selfish? Demanding? Irritable? Unforgiving? How would your spouse answer for you?
We all need reminders. Work at your marriage each and every day. If you aren’t working at improving yourself and your marriage chances are your relationship will soon suffer. Here are a few suggestions that may help you get started: check in with your spouse throughout the day, compliment your spouse, show appreciation for the ordinary things they do but you take for granted, read a marriage book together, attend a marriage retreat, read daily marriage blogs, join a marriage group at your church, schedule a date night each week and put the phones down. You may discover that the more intentional you are, the more intimacy may be ignited too – insert wink here.